Sunday, August 20, 2017

The Wifely Unit Has No Sense Of Adventure

Tomorrow is our wedding anniversary.
The same day as this big eclipse thing.
Thankfully we just head across the river to Edgefield in Troutdale every year so we shouldn't have to deal with the traffic.
Actually, she is already there and has been since Friday hanging out with one of her sisters who's birthday is today.

We were there last year too but I had to work so when I went to go over there, I took the little Sprite on it's maiden voyage out of town.
Here it is sitting in front of the joint.The first time in 20 some odd years the thing actually got me somewhere and back without breaking down.


That was all well and good until it was time to come home.
She had the kid drop her off and didn't have her car.
There is no passenger side seat in the Sprite.

So she had to call the kid to come get her. There was a certain amount of grief received over this.

Fast forward to this year, she has been over there since Friday again and it was the same deal, she had the kid drop her off.
There still isn't a passenger side seat in the Sprite either.

So she sends me a text message telling me not to bring the Sprite because she don't have a car.
The conversation via text went like this,

Ding, I get a message.

Her, Don't drive the Sprite down here, I don't have a car.

A couple minutes of fucking around on the internet and I sent her this,


Her, ?

Me. It's a milk crate.

Her, Why?

Me, For you to sit on in the Sprite.

Her, No.

Me, It's clean.

Her, No.

Me, OK, I'll put a cushion on it, Geez.

Her, No.

Me,

OK, Ok, damn you are hard to please woman but I am all over it.

Her, Whatever. ( She is plenty annoyed now)

Me, I'll even bolt it down just for you.
Should I put the top up?

Her, Dead silence.

Me, Alright, I'll be there later today with your little hoopty.

Her, K, I don't really know what you're talking about but whatever.

Me, Your car.
Lighten up, I'm just fucking with you.Smooch.

Her, Kinda figured anyway, bite me.


So she does have a bit of a sense of humor but no sense of adventure.

One of these days I'll tell you guys about the "Electric Van" I had back in the day and the time me and the old man got drunker than piss boiled owls at a family Christmas party and I had to take him home in the fucker.
It had a milk crate for a seat on the passenger side.
It's hilarious.

So posting might be a bit light, we shall see.

Oh, and BTW, I am getting the floor pans cleaned up and painted in the little POS so I can glue down some carpet.
The seats are going to be expensive no matter which way I go.
Over $2,000 plus freight to buy new ones and probably close to that to have mine redone.
$500 just for the seat skins but at over 50 years old, the frames are rusted and all the guts inside are shot.
I am going to throw that duct taped motherfucker in on the drivers side because that one is so far gone I am basically sitting in a bowl.



Saturday, August 19, 2017

Smokin' Hot Aussie RedNecks?!

The cognitive dissonance level is way up there watching these two smokin' little hotties fuck with each other like pubescent redneck boys all over the United States do every day.



Gotta admit they have quite the sense of humor though.

Warm Up The Bulldozers!


This great idea received vial Email from a sweet little old lady.
I say go for it.

Friday, August 18, 2017

Derp Der Der!!

Oh you sexy baby, Lol!





Seattle Mayor Agrees That Statue Of Lenin Must Go Too

Take that ya fuckin' Commie assholes.



Seattle mayor hands Trump supporters big win

Right wing activists compare Seattle Vladimir Lenin statute to Confederate monuments


Seattle Mayor Ed Murray and a handful of President Donald Trump's most ardent supporters agree: It's time for Fremont's statue of Vladimir Lenin to come down.
During an interview with KIRO Radio 97.3 on Wednesday, Murray advocated for the statue's removal in response to a question, saying:
"In the last few days, Seattleites have expressed concerns and frustration over symbols of hate, racism and violence that exist in our city. Not only do these kinds of symbols represent historic injustices, their existence causes pain among those who themselves or whose family members have been impacted by these atrocities. We should remove all these symbols, no matter what political affiliation may have been assigned to them in the decades since they were erected. This includes both confederate memorials and statues idolizing the founder of the authoritarian Soviet regime. Both are on private property, but I believe the confederate memorial at Lake View Cemetery and the Lenin statue in Fremont should be removed. We should never forget our history, but we also should not idolize figures who have committed violent atrocities and sought to divide us based on who we are or where we came from."
Murray's statement came a day after a small group led outspoken Trump supporter Jack Posobiec demonstrated in front of the statue, equating it with Confederate memorials being removed on the East Coast in the wake of last weekend's deadly violence in Virginia.


Bye bye Vladdy old boy, ya Commie asshole.

Gas It!!


Just once, that's all I ask.

New York Times Calls For Outright Ban On Open Carry

Because guns are fucking scary man.
This latest bit of panty wetting was caused by someone noticing several people exercising their absolute right to protect themselves during last weeks little tête-à-tête in Charlottesville.



That someone would be a Mr.John Feinblatt, who it says in the fine print at the very bottom of this Op-Ed by the way, is the President of Everytown For Gun Safety.

I'm not linking to the fucking assholes.


This absolute horror and uncivilised practice is, according to this Op-Ed, a " legal loophole" that is prohibited in several states specifically already when done while protesting, especially political protesting, as it is a form of terrorism.

When militia members and white supremacists descended on Charlottesville, Va., last Saturday with Nazi flags and racist placards, many of them also carried firearms openly, including semiautomatic weapons. They came to intimidate and terrify protesters and the police. If you read reports of the physical attacks they abetted, apparently their plan worked.

They might try to rationalize their conduct as protected by the First and Second Amendments, but let’s not be fooled. Those who came to Charlottesville openly carrying firearms were neither conveying a nonviolent political message, nor engaged in self-defense nor protecting hearth and home.

Plain and simple, public terror is not protected under the Constitution. That has been the case throughout history. And now is the time to look to that history and prohibit open carry, before the next Charlottesville.

Historically, lawmakers have deemed open carry a threat to public safety. Under English common law, a group of armed protesters constituted a riot, and some American colonies prohibited public carry specifically because it caused public terror. During Reconstruction, the military governments overseeing much of the South responded to racially motivated terror (including the murder of dozens of freedmen and Republicans at the 1866 Louisiana Constitutional Convention) by prohibiting public carry either generally or at political gatherings and polling places. Later, in 1886, a Supreme Court decision, Presser v. Illinois, upheld a law forbidding groups of men to “parade with arms in cities and towns unless authorized.” For states, such a law was “necessary to the public peace, safety and good order.”


Someone grab a mop, there is piss all over the floor now.

Let me point something out here to this cowering socialite scold,

When the violence broke out there due to the coordinated actions of the police and the thugs of ANTIFA,

NO ONE GOT SHOT.

Whoa Nelly!

What the fuck ya know Poindexter?

Someone actually had some restraint.

I could go on here and rip this stupid fucking cunt a new asshole four or five more times but I am going to let that fact sit right there and speak for its self.

Oh who am I kidding, Fuck You Feinblatt.


Open Carry is very much the law of the land in many states and it should be in all of them.
Limp wristed little pansies like you can even do it.
Better yet, Concealed Carry should be the law of the land, period.

That way those punk ass bitches with ANTIFA would have to think twice about attacking people in the first place.
When everyone can carry for self defense, who is going to say who is and who isn't?
If you decide it's a great idea to go smack someone you oppose politically with a baseball bat then it's going to be like playing the lottery, with your life.

But anti gun little pricks like you don't have to worry about ANTIFA now do ya?
They is your peeps, right? (Cough cough, COMMIE RAT BASTARDS, cough)

Remember this the next time your panties start chafing your tender little bits because you are afraid of guns you asshole,


Now go home and make your wife a fucking sandwich ya fucking pussy.



Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Civil War 2.0 Is Upon Us

Unless you have been living in a cave the last few months it is hard not to see what passes for news around these parts,
That news has been saturated lately with reports of violent protests and counter protests with the unfortunate loss of life of one female ANTIFA member in Charlottesville Virginia being the first of what is now obviously going to be the death of many Americans in the upcoming festivities.

It is now out of control and the fight has been joined on both sides.


Government and law enforcement agencies have now been proven without a doubt to be backing these sometimes openly Communist motherfuckers and the bell continues to toll calling for more hostilities.

The Left in this country have crossed the line of no return at this point and every day you see more insanity run amok.

What is inevitably going to happen is that they are going to start what they can't finish and there is going to be retribution meted out in large doses.

Since one of their identifying traits is a complete lack of knowledge about history they don't have the ability to look to that history and see that Newtons third law of motion is a constant.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

The pendulum always swings two ways.


Apparently they were also denied this little bit of wisdom as they were being spoon fed their Socialist Pablum,

"Old age and treachery wins over youth and vigor every time".


This ANTIFA bunch is going to fuck around and start pissing off large amounts of regular people and that is when they are going to lose.

Blocking major freeways and causing traffic back ups so they can show off is one guaranteed way to do that.

Visiting physical violence on peaceful protesters with a permit with the tacit approval if not active backing of a state government and it's law enforcement is another way.

Just to be clear here, I in no way condone anyone affiliated with Nazism or the White Supremacy movement.
Being white does not automatically make one supreme at anything and Nazism is just as bad as Communism in my book.


Trying to erase history is a pathetic attempt to deny your own heritage no matter what your family history is.
If you are an American then all that has happened in this country whether good or bad is part of your heritage and trying to remove the physical reminders of that across the country only proves to me that the education system in this country is broken beyond repair.

Education has been replaced by indoctrination and functional illiteracy.

You are just smart enough to be dangerous to yourselves.


That this great civil disturbance is being fomented by a bunch of fucking Commies, their sympathisers and wannabe's is what is going to be
what brings huge numbers of Americans together to remind you little assholes that we have burned entire cities to the ground over that shit before.


Just keep in the back of your ignorant little minds that We the People have enough weaponry that it scares the living shit out of our own government when they stop looting the place long enough to think about it.

I suppose if I think about it a certain way that you might actually be starting something that winds up being good for this country in the long run.
We might just be able to clean house and get rid of a whole bunch of useless and parasitic cocksuckers of all shapes and sizes at one go.

So here it is you Commie Fucks,

You want blood?
You got it.



Take A Wild Fucking Guess

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

A Timeless Message

Good on ya girl.


The first two jobs I ever had were in food service.
I started out washing dishes.
That didn't last too long.
The second job, of all things, was me being a Short Order cook at a medium sized restaurant that specialized in breakfasts at the tender age of 19.

I worked my ass off.

There were two waitresses and I kept them both running.
Not only did we do breakfast, I did lunches and dinners too.
Made french fries one fucking potato at a time in a little press cutter hanging on the wall, made hash browns by the pound, broasted chicken, made oyster stew and all kinds of shit.

To this day I can remember just how much fun it was to brick that hot motherfucking grill every day.

That place is still open down in North Bend Oregon, it's right across the street from where the huge chip pile was at the now closed Weyerhaeuser lumber mill my Grandfather worked at for 25 years.They tore down most of the mill that was literally a mile long years ago and now there is an Indian Casino there.
I stopped in there for breakfast a while back when I had to go down there for my Grandmothers funeral.
They still make a killer breakfast.


Since I have experienced the amount of work, stress and asshole customers these people have to deal with every fucking day, I ALWAYS tip well.
My wife tries to argue about it every time we eat out and every time I ignore her and tip well anyway.

I would have to receive extremely bad service before I wouldn't leave a tip and to be honest, if it was that bad I would be saying something right to the servers face first.

So good on ya Ashley, even if this was from years ago, someone raised that girl right and her date was a fucking jerk.

I'll Be Out In The Garage If You Need Me



I know a couple of career Drama Queens who will make shit up if they can't find something to be butt hurt about.
I have seen them do it.

Fuck that drama bullshit, I have neither the time, energy nor patience for that shit anymore.

The fact is, a couple of people I have to deal with on a daily basis are little drama queens and I have gotten to the point that I either ignore them or wind their little asses up to warp fucking 9 and send them off on their little way.

I have also been known to just point and laugh at their theatrics. Sometimes that really sets them off.

Like I said, fuck that drama bullshit.

Grow the fuck up.

Racist Bastards

No Black!



It's shocking!

Monday, August 14, 2017

Y'all Pay Attention Here Now, This Is Real Food

I get a kick out of this guy but I'm going to get real serious here for a minute.

This, is how you cook a pork chop.

It is also THE EXACT SAME WAY MY GRANNY MADE GRAVY.

She's been gone forty years now but let me tell you, this is one thing I paid attention to while she was still alive and I make my gravy the same way to this day.

This here is the real deal now.
Ya gotta use a cast iron pan for this or it just ain't right and ya gotta use bacon grease despite what he says in the video.
I still have some of Granny's cast iron skillets and they are older than I am.
If you learn to take care of 'em they will last several life times.
She always had a little tin can of bacon grease right on the back of the stove and used it every day.

Now y'all be quiet and let the man talk.



Now that there gravy is good on just about everything, I ain't kidding.
It's good on mashed potatoes, biscuits, fried taters, rice, meatloaf, and pork chops obviously but it really shines on some crispy hash browns on a Sunday mornin' breakfast with bacon and sausage next to a big ol' pile of scrambled eggs.


Yes, sir.

The only time I ever get to eat like this is when I cook it myself.
I married a damn Yankee girl from Minnesota and she don't know squat about Southern cooking.
Don't wanna learn neither.

'At's alright, I knows how.

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